Lotus of Ice
by Noboyuki
Summary: It's wartime in the country of Mochi. But Sasuke Uchiha is in jail for draft dodging. There his life is changed forever by the last person he expected. Awful summary. Yaoi. NaruSasu , KakaIru side-pairing. Yaoi,violence,and frenching lawyers!
1. Chapter 1

**Alright, I've finally got the first chapter of this thing up! I accept and enjoy receiving reviews and criticism, but if you review, please stick to the story itself, don't just bash it because you don't like some of the elements. The story does have violence, homosexual relationships, and mature situations, so if any of those aren't your thing, just don't read. Now that the usual schtick is out of the way, please enjoy. **

**I do not own Naruto or it's charaters.**

"Let me go, you bastards!" Sasuke shouted, struggling against the pair of arms that were restraining him. He kicked and lashed out with his legs, desperately trying to break free, but the arms had too tight of a grip on him, and the next thing he knew, he was flung down hard on the cold, granite floor of the jail cell. It was cold, the merciless winter wind whipping between the bars, the opening providing the only obscured view to the outside, and Sasuke felt his body involuntarily shiver. He wrapped his arms around his torso to try to retain some warmth, his breath coming out in a cloud as he breathed out, and tilted his face up again to glare at his captors. There was four of them in all, all trained bounty hunters, among them the man who had "escorted" him who retreated back to stand among them. Each stood six feet tall, opposed to Sasuke's height of five feet, eight inches, and as their narrowed eyes bore down on him, he felt another shiver go up his spine. In one last ditch attempt to overwhelm his capturers, Sasuke leapt to his feet and tried to dive around them, but all it resulted in was a black eye. The sheer force directed by the blow caused Sasuke to crash to the floor again, a resounding smack filling the air as his right cheek met the hardened floor.

One man snickered at the sight of Sasuke struggling to pull himself up onto his hands and knees."We got quite a bounty off of you, traitor..." he sneered, giving Sasuke a swift kick in the gut.

Sasuke let out a strangled cry of pain, doubling over as his whole body convulsed. Another man stepped forward, scowling down on the defeated man before him.

"Have fun in prison." he barked out, and with that, the four bounty hunters left, the iron door to Sasuke's cell clanging shut. Through his labored breathing, Sasuke heard the click of the door's lock being latched, and then he was alone. Sitting up slowly, Sasuke peered around the empty cell from his one good eye, taking in the bland grey walls, the bars over the make-shift window, the rusty looking bed frame in the far corner with its tattered sheets and worn down mattress. He could already tell that wasn't going to provide much heat. Dryly, Sasuke gazed down at his rugged appearance. He was wearing a blue, collared t-shirt, and white shorts, which were now coated in the dust from the floor. He had no socks to shelter his feet, only a pair of wooden sandals, and the exposed skin of his arms and legs were already tingling with the cold. With another shuddered breath, Sasuke drew his arms around his torso once more. Mochi was a country known for its unforgiving, bitter winters, but so far Sasuke had never had to face their terrors, coming from a rich family that owned a well furnished, warm home.

With a dejected sigh, Sasuke rose to his feet and shuffled over to the lone bed, huddling underneath the thin sheets and drawing the only blanket, if it could even be called that with so many tears and holes, up to his chin. Another series of shivers racked Sasuke's body and he let out a small moan.

'All for refusing the draft...' he thought cynically.

Well, there was no use fighting it now. He was trapped, and for now, the only thing he could do was try to find some form of sleep. He would need it here in this sector of the county jail.

Over the next few weeks, Sasuke kept his head down and his presence low, so as not to bring about unnecessary attention that might draw him into a fight. Another act of disobedience would only land him in further tribulation.

Eventually, Sasuke was transferred from the local county jail, which was overcrowded as it was with everyday offenders of petty crimes, to the federal jail, renowned for its gang activity and violence. Here was where the men, who were imprisoned for long durations of time, sometimes even a lifetime, were held, murderers, sex offenders, the list went on. Immediately as Sasuke captured his first glimpse of the desolate building, he knew his life would never be the same. As he was lead to his cell, his hands cuffed behind him, his eyes met with the yellow hued, slitted ones, of Orochimaru, the inmates name who was known to everyone, law breaker or not. Sasuke remembered seeing the wanted posters bearing Orochimaru's countenance plastered all the way throughout Mochi, and a shudder of dread shot down his spine. For once, he was glad to feel the rough prod of the prison guard's weapon on his back, forcing Sasuke to move forward and to break eye contact with the unmoving, unblinking slits that were Orochimaru. Finally, Sasuke was shoved into his cell, again collapsing to the floor with a "thud!", and as the key was turned in the prison cell swiftly, Sasuke found himself alone in the room once more.

Or that was so he thought. A flicker of movement from the corner of his eyes caused Sasuke to leap to his feet, whipping around to meet the surprised gaze of a pair of blue eyes. His cellmate appeared to be a boy around the same age as him, maybe younger. He himself was eighteen, of course, that was what got him in this mess to begin with. The teen wore the traditional grey clothes of a prisoner, not different from the pile Sasuke had glimpsed waiting for him on his own bunk on the opposite end of the room, and his hair was blonde, dredged up in unruly spikes. What spoke most though were the boys' eyes, almost shimmering in the limited light seeping in through the window, their crystal clear depths seeming to tell a story of their own. The blonde boy said nothing, and neither did Sasuke, which is how he intended to keep it. Sensing no danger from this unexpected presence in the room, Sasuke turned his back on the strange boy and went to lie down on the opposing bed. Hopefully these covers would provide a little more heat than that sad excuse of a blanket in the local jail cell had.

And so that was how it began, Sasuke's imprisonment as a draft-dodging prisoner, who decided it would be better to face the dangers of being an inmate than face the horrors that would await him in joining the war effort abroad.

**And there we have it. Please rate and review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Whoo! I finally got the second chapter up! Sorry to anyone who has been waiting for this, I'm rather ashamed that it took me so long to update. But I can guarantee that the next chapter will be up within the next few days.**

**Also, I do not own Naruto or it's characters. If only...**

Sasuke's first week at the federal prison passed, surprisingly, without incident. Despite this small reassurance, Sasuke never let down his guard for even an instant, his eyes always scanning and alert, his muscles tensed in his arms and legs as if daring any of the prison's rough houses to cross his path. Any man that met the steely, cold eyes of the young Uchiha, whether they be hardened convicts or heartless murderers, knew not to stick there neck out in front of this new addition to their ranks. However, there was a flip side to the Uchiha's output appearance.

This was Sasuke's inevitable downfall.

Though Sasuke's intent was to be intimidating, which oftentimes worked with most of the other inmates, if one was to get past Sasuke's demeanor they would actually find they were attracted to the scowl he wore as it was a compliment against Sasuke's still boyish, rugged looks. Of course, Sasuke had heard rumors of the 'relationships' between desperate men separated too long from the outside world in prison. He also knew that more often than not, these 'relationships' were in fact one man forcing himself on another and using the other man to quench his desires. Sasuke never even contemplated the possibility that such a thing could ever befall him. If he had been more attentive to what followed him, however, instead of only focusing his attention on what lay straight ahead in his path, Sasuke would have realized that the prickling on his spine wasn't due to the apprehension of his new surroundings, but that he was being watched by a set of very familiar pale, slitted yellow eyes.

The middle of Sasuke's second week into his transfer was when disaster finally hit.

"Sasuke Uchiha, I presume?" a quiet, sinister voice breathed just behind Sasuke's left ear. Sasuke froze in place, the weights he gripped in both hands suspended in mid-lift as Sasuke sensed the soft flick of a tongue against his earlobe. Slowly, he turned around, setting the weights on the ground at his feet, to meet the squinted eyes of Orochimaru. Almost immediately, Sasuke felt his forehead break out in a cold sweat, his hands shaking at his sides as his mind hazed over into a clammy fear. Sasuke quickly jammed his hands into his sides to hide the obvious quivering. He opened his mouth to make some smart response, but he found that his throat was suddenly dry, so he was forced to swallow rather loudly, giving away his discomfort before he could try again.

"What do you want with me?" Sasuke barked out, attempting to make his quavering voice sound strong and undaunted.

"Come, Sasuke. I've never done anything to personally offend you before, have I? Surely you can afford to address me in a...politer tone, hm?" Orochimaru openly grinned. He was almost immediately cut off.

"How do you know my name?" Sasuke demanded.

"Ah, that. Well, let's just say...I have my _resources,_" Orochimaru chuckled.

At this, Orochimaru momentarily glanced behind him with a smirk stretched across the length of his pale, snake like face. Sasuke apprehensively followed his gaze and a violent shudder ran up his back as he realized the rest of the gang Orochimaru belonged to, "The Akatsuki" were there in the room, standing off in the shadows just a few feet away from where Orochimaru and Sasuke now stood. One of the first things Sasuke had learned here in the federal prison was never to get involved with anything surrounding the Akatsuki. The other convicts only acquiesced to speak the gang's name aloud when in private, away from any of the member's earshot, and even then Sasuke only overheard snippets of whispered conversations. None of the rumors circling around the Akatsuki were any less than vile, and Sasuke had quickly drilled that fact into the back of his brain. What was even more harrowing was the fact that, in their twisted hierarchy, Orochimaru was considered low ranking. He knew these nine men were not people he wanted to cross. By the time Sasuke returned his eyes to Orochimaru, he found the villain leering at him in such a way that it filled Sasuke with an unexplainable feeling of dread.

"I make it a point not to associate with _murderers,_" Sasuke growled from between clamped teeth, his trembling hands clenching angrily at his sides.

"Tsk. So direct, aren't we?" Orochimaru's apparent smirk instantaneously vanished, and took a downright turn. "Fine then. As I see that this conversation isn't going to be anything remotely close to civil, I'll get straight to the point. You asked me what I wanted with you? Well..."

Orochimaru quickly leaned forward, his mouth so close to Sasuke's ear that he could feel the murderer's breath against his neck, making the hairs there stand on end, and Sasuke immediately went stiff as a board.

"That's exactly the thing. I want _you_."

If Sasuke had doubted that his face could get any paler, he was proved wrong once those suggestive words slithered out of Orochimaru's mouth. Sasuke's face drained of any last bit of color it still held, and this time, Sasuke couldn't stop his whole body from shaking. Orochimaru was now pulling back his head, gazing at the sheen of sweat from the working out that covered Sasuke's lean built body, his eyes clouded over in lust and his mind surely straying to more unsavory images of Sasuke then what he saw before him. Uncomprehending, beyond the point of fear and now at full-blown terror, Sasuke took an involuntary step backwards. Orochimaru quickly fixed this, closing the distance between them and running his hand down Sasuke's shirt, slowly traveling down, down...

Suddenly, Sasuke felt Orochimaru's hand wrenched from the edge of his gray uniform and the next thing he knew, Orochimaru was sprawled on the ground, his right hand covering the bloody mess that seconds before hadn't been a broken nose.

"You get your hands off him, Orochimaru! He's MY bitch!" a voice directly in front of Sasuke roared. The room went dead silent and Sasuke felt a flush of heat fill his face, the color quickly turning from ashen white to beat red. Nobody had ever dared to defy the Akatsuki before, yet here was this voice challenging claim over a member's "property". It wasn't until then that Sasuke realized he had been staring down at the ground, for he was unable to see anything but his savior's feet. Slowly, he tilted his head up again to see another younger boy standing before him, the boy's face telling volumes through the menacing glower.

It was Sasuke's mysterious cell mate.

Swiftly, the boy turned on Sasuke in a flash of movement so fast his disheveled mind couldn't process it quickly enough. The next thing he knew, the boy was by his ear.

"Come _on!_" he hissed in barely above a whisper.

It was only when the other boy's hand wrenched at Sasuke's shoulder did Sasuke come to his senses and turn to run after the boy. His escape still wasn't quick enough to avoid the vicious glare Orochimaru sent him, blood now smeared all over the front of his face and dripping onto his clothing.

"You filthy vermin!" Orochimaru spat at the blonde boy. He rose, about to pursue them, before a strong arm held him in place. The arm in question belonged to a tall, compactly muscular man with orange hair and several facial piercings. "Leave him VIII", the man said in a hollow voice, referring to Orochimaru's rank in the gang. "You know of our plans for that one." Orochimaru seethed, but knew better than to contradict II.

Sasuke ran after his cellmate with unseeing eyes, no talk passing between them as each lay deep within their own thoughts. Only when they arrived at the deserted mess hall, already filed out of since lunch had been served and away from the prying eyes of the prison company, did Sasuke's savior finally venture to speak.

"What are you, a fool? Two weeks into prison, and you're already getting involved with _Orochimaru_!" the boy spat out between gasping breaths. Still, Sasuke did not speak, until finally the other boy plopped down into an empty bench, grasping his head between his hands in frustration. A few agonizing minutes of silence passed between the two, the other boy not venturing to speak any further.

"Tell me one thing..." Sasuke finally breathed his eyes still glassy looking and dazed. The other boy looked up from between his hands, a questioning look in his face.

"...what is your name?"

The other boy looked back down, as if contemplating something, and then glanced back up at the dazed character he had just saved.

"...Naruto."

**Please rate and review! It makes everything better.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Ha! I finally got a chapter out quickly! Just a heads up, this chapter begins a side-arc, involving Iruka and Kakashi. You'll see more of Naruto and Sasuke next chapter.**

**And of course I do not, and never will own Naruto or it's characters.**

_10:45 AM_

"I'm late, I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!" a young lawyer in his mid twenties accosted himself over and over again as he sped down the hallway at a swift sprint, his black leather suitcase swinging haphazardly at his side and the enormous, precariously stacked set of papers swaying to and fro in sync with his flailing limbs. He rounded yet another corner at full speed, just barely missing an elderly gentleman who had most likely just emerged from the court room at the end of the morning case. The aged gentleman managed to throw himself out of the lawyer's way in the nick of time, and he brandished his bowler hat at the rushed man with a wave of indignance.

"Sorry!" the lawyer called over his shoulder, having no time to spare on proper apologies and formalities. He'd already rounded four hallways, and he had, oh, about fifteen more to go before he came upon the entrance of the huge court room of the district court. This was his first case at the federal level, and as an upcoming lawyer, he was damned if he was going to start off his _professional_ career by showing up late, with a crowd of witnesses to prove it! His chest already heaving from running so long, the lawyer gasped in choppy breaths as he struggled to get enough oxygen into his lungs. _Just a few more corners...just a few more..._

However, the young lawyer's thoughts were cut short as he turned to face forward once again only to run head long into a rather solid something that lay in his path. With a rather audible, "Oof!", both unlucky parties fell to the ground in a heap, the lawyer's suitcase flying in one direction, and all of his papers scattering in the other. The lawyer quickly scrambled up onto his feet, his face flushing in embarrassment that he'd actually _hit_ someone this time, and offered a hand to the other man who was still collecting his bearings on the floor.

"I'm so sorry; I wasn't paying attention where I was going. Here, let me help you," the lawyer rushed an apology, his embarrassment making him sputter his words. The man on the ground, his head still bowed, grasped the lawyer's outstretched one and the lawyer swiftly hefted him to his feet.

"Iruka Umino eh?" the stranger finally responded, handing the younger lawyer his ID card. "Your first day on the job, huh?" he added with a chuckle, brushing the dust absently from his sullied suit.

"Um, yes, and yes. Is it that obvious?" Iruka asked nervously, moving to the side of the hallway to collect up his discarded suitcase. By the time he straightened up and turned to face the unidentified man again, the other had collected up all of the lawyer's papers and had them neatly stacked up as he proffered them forward with a warm smile.

"Just a little bit," the other man laughed, "Well, I need to go. The Uchiha family can't wait forever. Oh, and good luck with your case!" Barely a second after the lawyer had managed to mumble out a weak "Thanks", the mysterious man had turned to leave. Iruka was preparing to do the same when finally it hit him. He'd known when he first laid eyes on the man that there was something familiar about his oddly colored hair, already pure silver even though the man didn't look one day over thirty. His voice was...so warm and inviting, yet teasing and condescending in the same way...

"Kakashi?" Iruka whirled around in bewilderment, but the silver-haired man was already long gone.

Iruka stood there numbly, barely able to believe the strange twist of fate that had befallen him. His arms felt heavy, his chocolate brown eyes open wide, his lips barely parted. _Kakashi. _He still couldn't believe it. The two of them had known each other since college; they even went to the same Law School. They were best friends...well Kakashi was Iruka's best friend at least. The four of them had been inseparable: Kakashi, Obito, Rin, and himself. No matter how hard he tried he could never become more in Kakashi's eyes than Obito.

Then Iruka shot up, an obnoxiously bright blush filling his cheeks. "_But they ended up dating!"_ Of course he could never measure up to that he wanted that anyway. If he wasn't so flustered, Iruka would have noticed the burning rouge on his face that had flared dramatically at his recent thoughts. He'd never wanted Kakashi _that _way.

**_CLONG!_**

The courthouse bell struck eleven, making the young lawyer jump about ten feet in the air. "_Right", he thought to himself, "Naruto."_

He had to admit the one good thing about being incarcerated for three years for a crime he didn't commit did have one advantage. It had given him purpose. He **would **get Naruto out of that "Hell on Earth", and he **would **let the world know of his innocence. Even if it cost him all of his remaining years. Kakashi would have to wait.

Iruka remained a few seconds longer, still stunned at this turn of events, before reality came back to smack him in the face.

"_Shit_, I'm **SO** LATE!"

**Please rate and review! **


	4. Chapter 4

**I present: Chapter 4! Now we're back with Sasuke and Naruto, right where chapter 2 left off. By the way, I plan to be putting up the Kakashi/Iruka chapters every three or four Naruto/Sasuke chapters, in case you were wondering. There is a point to them, I promise!**

**No, I own nothing Naruto-related, other than a few fanfictions and a wall scroll signed by Yuri Lowenthal.**

"First of all, I'm NOBODY'S bitch." Despite the fact that his roommate had just saved him from almost certain rape, Sasuke wasn't planning to get on his knees and declare his eternal thanks. Judging by the other man's previous actions, he could very well be a rapist himself; this was jail after all.

The boy, apparently called Naruto, groaned. "Are you always this difficult? No wonder the 'Snake Queen' was into you."

"What do you mean by that?" Sasuke shot back.

"I mean," Naruto continued. "..is that you're Orochimaru's type: The stuck-up little prick, who thinks he's better than everyone else. And I've got some news for ya rich-boy, and yes it's that obvious," he added with a grin. Then he went on, his voice changing from teasing to stern, "if you keep parading around here like you've been, someone's gonna... Let's just say you won't stay so pretty."

"Fuck off," Sasuke hissed at the other, barely resisting the urge to smash in Naruto's face. He wasn't a violent person, but he also was never one to take anyone's crap. And he certainly was not going to sit there and let a criminal lecture him, especially not someone who looked even younger than himself. "And mind your own business brat."

"Brat? I'm 20 you bastard! I'm older than you," Naruto scoffed. "Oh, and if you want to talk about brats, I'm still waiting for the one in front of me to thank me for saving his butt from being raped-literally.."

"Yeah, I should be **_so _**thankful to the guy who claimed me as his own personal whore!" This confrontation was starting to pass from irritating to emotionally taxing on the younger man.

"You thought I was serious about that? God you're dense!" Naruto said, seeming to settle down a bit but still giving the other a scathing look, as if to say, 'wow, you're the single dumbest piece of pond scum to ever walk the earth'. "I only said that so that no one would come on to you anymore. It's part of my plan for the two of us, and it's gonna help us both. So, c'mon, trust me," he said, a rather goofy grin spreading across his face.

"Trust you? Give me one reason I should trust anything you have to say!" Sasuke ended up yelling at his smiling cellmate. He had meant to keep his stoic demeanor in place, but this guy...something about him made Sasuke feel not like himself. He usually stayed calm and calculating, not like this...at least not since...damn it. "My life is none of your concern!"

Naruto's eyes softened, those clear blue pools regarding the dark-haired man. His fist were clenched, his eyes were cold and steely. But those aggressive features weren't what Naruto was watching. It was the boy's shoulders- they were shaking, not out of rage, but in fear. The subtle, almost unnoticeable motions that Sasuke wasn't even aware he was making was what Naruto gazed upon. "I don't want to see you get hurt... So it **_is _**my concern. And if you don't start learning to trust, you're just making yourself the worst thing you can be around here. _Alone._"

Before Sasuke could respond, a loud bell sounded out through the prison indicating that the inmates' hour of recreation was over. "We had better head back to our cell, before the guards show up," Naruto said. Sasuke nodded; they weren't even supposed to be in this part of the prison during the hour. They turned to leave, Naruto speaking one last time. "Just think about what I said, alright dumbass."

'Why is this guy so interested in me?' Sasuke thought to himself as he followed his cellmate back to their shared excuse for a living space. Sasuke was still wary to trust the blond man. He still hadn't shaken the thought that Naruto was just going to molest him himself. Even so, this boy seemed somehow different than the others. He looked 'softer', as if there was something familiar, welcoming, warm about him. Like there was a kindred benevolence that started within the other boy's chest and radiated not only throughout his own body, but the whole area around him. And what the blond had said was true, he was alone.

The guards gave them no trouble, for as far as they knew, the two prisoners had done nothing to warrant any further punishment. They entered their cell, the door automatically closing behind them. Naruto retreated to his top bunk without a word. Sasuke walked over to his own bed, and sat down, his back slightly hunched over. About an hour had passed, before either spoke. In truth, this was an improvement; before their fateful encounter that day neither had spoken a single word to the other. Finally Sasuke tilted his had up to speak to his cellmate.

"Fine. I trust you, for now at least. So what's this 'master plan' of yours?"

Naruto, who until that moment had been lying casually on his bed, shot his eyes open, and bolted upright. "That was fast! I thought you'd spend _at least _a few days sulking before you gave in," he chirped, sticking his head over the side of the loft, that same ditzy smile plastered across his face.

Sasuke grimaced; never in his life did he think he would meet someone so annoying his eye would actually twitch from annoyance. But here he was, staring at the upside down head of a moron convict, who had assumed he was the type to sulk like a little emo-boy. He _had _spent most of the last hour sulking, but that was beside the point. His answer to the blond was a swift punch to the underside of Naruto's bed; shaking it considerably and making its inhabitant flip over the side and land painfully onto the hard stone floor.

"YOW! What was that for, bastard? I could've broken my damn neck!" Naruto yelled, understandably upset with his dark-haired companion. Sasuke actually did feel a little sorry for the poor boy, he had meant to scare him, not make the idiot actually fall. Luckily for the elder, the flip had caused him to land on his ass rather than his head or neck, making the fall much less harmful. "Sorry..." Sasuke said, offering Naruto his hand. The blond brightened up considerably at this seemingly kind gesture, and took Sasuke's hand. Then Sasuke continued. "...for a second there, I forgot what a moron you were, and thought you weren't dumb enough to fall from something like that."

"GAHH! You bastard!" Naruto yelled at him once again. But then he settled back down and plopped down next to Sasuke on the bed. "You know, that was a pretty strong punch; anyone could have been knocked off."

"Really?" Sasuke asked with a smirk, his tone becoming lower as it laced with condescension. "Your name is Anyone? I thought it was Naruto," he mused before letting out a low chuckle.

"Shut up." Naruto moaned. "I'm serious though, that was some punch. What did they put you in here for? Beating up a Pit-Bull?"

The sheer irony of those words made Sasuke smile. "Quite the opposite actually. Draft-dodging."

Naruto blinked in surprise. "No kidding? Huh, wouldn't have pegged you as a coward or a pacifier," he said, shrugging.

"It's pacifist, not pacifier you moron," Sasuke grunted, annoyed. "And I'm still waiting to hear this plan of yours."

"Oh right...Well it's not actually **my **plan. My friend Iruka was the person who came up with it," Naruto admitted, scratching the back of his head. "And he's waaay smarter than I am-"

"No kidding," Sasuke interjected.

"Do you want my help or not, bastard?" the blond growled. "Anyway...Iruka's really smart. He was in law school before he was arrested. The two of us met here after I turned 18. That's when I got transferred from Juvie, I guess he'd had it rough when he first came here and wanted to make it better for me..."

"Would you get on with it?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. I guess I was kinda rambling there. But it's actually pretty simple: I tell people I'm banging you, and then I don't actually do it!" Naruto chirped, clearly proud of himself.

"..."

"So what do ya think?" Naruto asked.

"I think it's the stupidest plan I've ever heard. No one would fall for that," Sasuke monotoned. He couldn't believe he had, even for a moment, thought that his cellmate would magically have a plan to solve his problems. He was just about to tell the boy to leave him alone, when something happened he wasn't expecting. Naruto wrapped his arm around his shoulders, and stared at him with that same stupid grin.

"Well yeah, but that's why we make it convincing," Naruto grinned. But his cellmate wasn't appeased just yet.

"Convincing how?" Sasuke questioned, cocking his head to the side in suspicion.

"Like I smack your ass once or twice, brag about how you can't walk without a limp, that sort of thing. And at night I get in bed with you, you pretend to try and fight me off, I make a few thrusting motions and moan a little, you scream a bit and we're done. Oh, and if you can fake cry a bit, that'd look good too," Naruto answered, rather quickly.

"Yeah," the dark haired man muttered. "And why is it that _I_'_m _playing the damsel in distress?" He inquired skeptically.

" 'Cause I'm the one with the rep around here. That's why I can punch goons like Snakey back there and not be dead! Besides I've been in here for years, and you're...well...pretty," Naruto explained, blushing a bit at the last word. Sasuke shared a similar reaction.

There was a long, excruciatingly awkward silence, before Sasuke spoke. "Fine. But I've got a few rules: No kissing, no groping, no nudity, no dirty/mushy talk, and if I ever feel as much as a boner, I will **END **you."

Naruto laughed heartily. "Deal." Then he extended his right hand. Sasuke showed the boy his first true smile since...awhile, took his hand in a tight grip, and shook.

**As always, rate and review! And don't be afraid to be critical, I like to know when I need improvement!**


	5. Chapter 5

**And here we have chapter five! I can't believe how long it took me to post this, that did NOT feel like a month went by. Sorry about all the false deadlines I set for myself, I'm... not gonna do that again.**

**As we all know, I do not own Naruto, or it's characters.**

_"I cannot believe I am doing this." _Sasuke thought to himself, extremely miffed. Even though he had agreed to Naruto's plan, Sasuke had been bitching about it nonstop ever since.

And yet, here he was, walking into the prison Mess Hall, with the arm of a convicted felon capturing his waist in a lazy grip. Said felon was showing a very uncharacteristic smirk, as if to say "Aw yeah, Daddy's tappin' this bitch!" to his fellow inmates. Sasuke scanned their faces to see if they were fooled. To the raven-haired man's slight surprise, they actually seemed to be, some simply shrugged and went back to their breakfast, while others seemed rather disappointed. Apparently Sasuke had gained popularity amongst more than just Orochimaru, as few even grinned and gave Naruto the thumbs-up sign. Sasuke groaned, with a frown so icy, it could freeze a blowtorch solid, chiseled into his profile.

They strolled over to an almost deserted table, it's only inhabitants being a rather short, red-haired man, and a blond man who had most of hair tied up at the top of his head, the rest covering his left eye. They seemed to not notice them, apparently engrossed in a conversation they were having. As Sasuke took his seat, Naruto remained standing, letting his arm slip from the other man's waist. Sasuke looked up to see what the blond was planning.

"I'll go get our food, you stay outta trouble while I'm gone, kay babe?" Naruto grinned at him. As he walked to the line, Sasuke had to use every ounce of self-control he had to keep silent, or else give away the ruse. He balled his fists, and ground his teeth, but nonetheless stayed stoic.

"You're not going to take that from _him _are you?" a taunting voice whispered into Sasuke's ear. He turned around suddenly to see the two men staring at him. "I mean, who decided that you belong to him right Sasori?" the same voice continued, flipitantly, coming from the blond one's mouth, speaking to Sasuke and his companion.

"Indeed, I would have thought it would have, at least, been the other way around Deidara" the man called Sasori responded calmly to the other.

Sasuke was going to kill Naruto.

"I know right? I mean he's taller, more adult looking, and I heard he's a real smartass." Deidara answered, keeping his carefree tone as if Sasuke wasn't even there. Then he turned back to him, his face completely serious. "What? Are you not going to say anything? Maybe he really does have his claws in you huh, _'babe'_?"

At this, Sasuke lost his temper. His eyes flashed with anger, cold and steely, "What the hell is you're problem!"

"Problem? We just think you're getting a raw deal here. We're sympathizing with you; after all, you don't deserve to be treated like that, especially from Uzumaki." Deidara remarked.

"Or Orochimaru..." Sasori added, with a bitter tone in his voice.

"Uzumaki?" Sasuke commented, before thinking.

Deidara burst out laughing, and Sasori let out a mild chuckle. "He doesn't even know his name!" Deidara said, still fighting back laughter.

"Really? Hey Sasori, what's Deidara's last name?"

All parties turned to see Naruto standing with two trays of sub-quality prison food, and a deep scowl on his face. "Well? Do you know Deidara's last name Sasori? I'm waiting." he spat at the red-head. Sasori looked away and said nothing, clearly giving his answer. "Yeah, didn't think so. And you two have been messing around for years. Maybe that says something."

Deidara lost it at this point, "Remember who you're talking to 'Blood Fox'!" he barked at the other blond man, standing to meet him at eye-level.

"Hey, you're the one who was messing with my woman, Ponytail. And relax; you can tell your boss that as long as his boys stay out of my way, I'll stay out of his." Naruto snapped back, very annoyed. Sasuke wanted to jump in, but to be honest, he had absolutely no idea what was going on.

Deidara, on the other hand, was livid. "YOU WRETCH! I'LL TELL HIM-"

"Enough Deidara. We've already ascertained everything we're going to at this point." Sasori said, placing his hand on the shoulder of his irate partner.

"But-"

"Now VII." He said sternly as he pulled a relenting Deidara away from the two younger prisoners. "You'll have your revenge, and more, once I's plan comes to fruition." he added quietly, so only his partner could hear.

"Yeah whatever VI. This isn't over." Deidara spat before following his superior.

Once the two older men had departed, Naruto let the trays fall ungracefully to the long table. "I can't leave you alone for a second, can I?" he hissed at the younger boy.

"I was doing just fine until you started mouthing off to them, idiot. Now they're probably holding a grudge on us." Sasuke retorted. He was not about to be blamed for this. "And this never would have happened if it weren't for your stupid plan."

"Yeah, you're right; I should have just let Orochimaru have his way with you. I am SO sorry, you bastard." There was a pause before Sasuke spoke again.

"...I'm sorry." he said at last. He was still getting used to this whole situation and wanted someone to blame. "I shouldn't have said that. You're the only one who has helped me at all here. I just hate this place so much..." he added quietly and sincerely. Another pause ensued between the two young men, their silence echoing more than the raucous chatter of the Mess Hall's inhabitants. Sasuke shifted slightly when Naruto wrapped his arm around him, gently massaging his shoulder. His first thought was to pull away, but the dark-haired man could not bring himself to separate the contact between himself, and the hyperactive blond. He couldn't help it; it felt so nice and comforting, like Naruto's strong, tanned fingers were rubbing away all his anxieties. "Naruto...I-"

"You really need to be more careful." Naruto told him softly, looking deeply into Sasuke's softened eyes. "Those guys are in the same gang as Orochimaru." he explained to a shocked looking Sasuke, a small frown adorning his face.

"They're in Akatsuki?" Sasuke asked in disbelief. It was inconceivable, two weeks in prison, and he was already on the hate-list of three members of the most brutal gang in Mochi. He cursed his body for tensing up, his heart racing. He didn't want to seem weak in front of Naruto. But Naruto just kept rubbing his shoulder soothingly.

"It's okay." Naruto reassured him, "I won't lie to you, the Akatsuki are really dangerous, but they hardly ever do anything, and those two were low-ranking as it is. C'mon, cheer up; I can't have you going all emo on me. Besides, I haven't even 'raped' you yet." he finished, grinning broadly. It was strange, but Sasuke actually did feel a little better.

"So," Sasuke said, starting to eat his breakfast, "your name's Uzumaki, huh?"

"Yeah." Uzumaki replied, stuffing his face with stale toast, "So, you gotta last name, bastard?"

"Of course I do, moron. It's Uchiha, Sasuke Uchiha."

Naruto grinned, "I'll keep that in mind then."

By nightfall, Sasuke was thoroughly pissed at his blond "lover". The day had snowballed since the incident at the Mess Hall. Naruto had wasted no time in letting the entire prison know about how he was "gonna pound this ass into jelly tonight, and unless they wanted to wake up missing an esophagus, they'd stay away". Granted, it had been exactly what he had said would happen, but Sasuke swore, if Naruto dared to slap his ass for the eleventh time that day, their partnership might come to a very abrupt, and bloody end.

"Ahh...well, I think that went pretty well, and I think they really bought it." Naruto said, stretching a bit. "So, do you want me to 'rape' you now, or wait a few hours?" Naruto joked playfully, oblivious to the look on one very unamused Uchiha. Luckily for the blond prisoner, as he turned to face his companion again, Sasuke's death glare was obvious for even him to see. "What?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe the absolute humiliation I had to endure all day long." He snapped at his cellmate.

"Aww come on, I had to go through that once too you know." Naruto moaned. It was true, even if Iruka's treatment of him during that time wasn't nearly as horrifying as what he had put Sasuke through.

"Is that so, Blood Fox?" Sasuke growled, acid dripping off his tongue.

A frightening change occurred in Naruto. It was the first time Sasuke had seen the blond truly angry. His playful disposition was gone, evaporated as quickly, and completely as water on a red-hot flat iron. He whipped around to face Sasuke, his once peaceful blue eyes burning with a fiery red anger. "You. Do **NOT. **Call me that!" he commanded. "I get that you've got your own issues but don't you dare compare them to mine! You have no idea what my life is like! You don't know anything about me!"

This was a terrible side of Naruto, frightening to say the least, but Sasuke stood his ground, staring fiercely at the other. "You're right, I don't know you." he admitted, but still cold as steel. "And until I do, I can't trust you the way I need to. So start sharing."

Naruto looked thoughtful, his eyes loosing that terrible, piercing quality. "I guess you're right." he sighed, flopping onto Sasuke's bottom bunk-bed. "Just promise me you won't think of me as a monster." Naruto pleaded to the other man. Sasuke joined him on the bed, a blank, unrelenting stare boring into his cellmate.

"We'll see."

**Yay! Another finished chapter! Please rate and review! **


	6. Chapter 6

**_After many months of not updating, I finally give you Chapter 6. Can't say I'm proud of that, but I wasn't exactly feeling inspired lately, and if I'm not into what I'm doing, it usually turns out like crap. Plus it was senior year in High School, we all know what that's like._**

**_That being said, I know from experience how frustrating it is to be reading a chapter story that doesn't update for months at a time. So if there are actually people who have been waiting for an update, I do deeply apologize._**

**_And of course, I do not own Naruto or its characters. Or Jeff Dunham stuff, I suppose._**

**_WARNING: This chapter contains two characters simulating(but not actually commiting) a rape. If this offends you, please don't read._**

**_—_**

"Well…" Naruto started, his nerves beginning to get the best of him. "Where should I start?"

"The beginning is always a popular choice." His cellmate said. Naruto had been stalling for a while now, and Sasuke was getting impatient.

"Yeah, but…I mean… can't we just wait until morning to do this or something, or tomorrow night…" the blond muttered, regretting his decision to tell Sasuke about this. He had hoped to wait at least a few weeks before revealing everything that had made people hate him most of his life. Honestly he had hoped wouldn't ever need to tell him at all, knowing less about a person was usually better for all parties in prison anyway. Why did he agree to this? This wasn't anything like how it went with Iruka.

"No, now." Sasuke stated firmly as if it was an absolute fact. "If you want this little farce to go on, I'm going to need to know why you're doing this, and that you're not worse than the people you are 'protecting me from'. And if I find out that even one thing you told me isn't true, that's it, I'm out." As he said this, Sasuke's tone never faltered. His eyes were set, his mind was made up.

"You're right." Naruto sighed, dejectedly. "But people usually hate me after they find out…so forgive me if I'm a little nervous." he added with a small weak smile. He took a deep breath to steady himself, seeking a nervous glance at Sasuke in the process. The dark-haired man did not look at him with kindness, but neither did he see the hatred and disgust the he was so used to being laid upon him. It was strange, but the ambivalence of his cellmate was a comfort to him.

"My dad was Minato Namikaze, yeah _that _one." Naruto started, referring to Sasuke's stunned look. "He was the top ambassador to Onhanishuri—'

"The Demon Country…" Sasuke stated.

"Yeah, but back then, we weren't at war with them, and we didn't call them that…name. It was all thanks to my dad. He saw them a people, like the rest of us, not the monsters the Prime Minister would have us believe."

"How would you know?" Sasuke snapped at him. "How do you know what those monsters are like?"

"Because… because my dad taught me to look past what people say about others and look at what they are really like." Naruto retorted, matching Sasuke anger.

"Whatever."

Naruto sighed. He knew he couldn't convince him otherwise, so he continued his tale. My dad was loved by everyone: he was an accomplished diplomat, a war hero, and one of the kindest men you ever met. It was pretty common knowledge that he was in the running to be next prime minister. But my mother…Kushina Kyuubiki…" he continued, his eyes growing sadder than Sasuke had seen on anyone. "She was an amazing mom… but she was sad. I never knew why, but sometimes she would just stare off with this look in her eyes…but I was too young to understand. I think my dad tried to help her, but nothing worked. Then things just fell apart."

Naruto had to stop for a moment. Sasuke said nothing, he knew what was coming. "She killed herself. Shot herself in the head."

"Naruto I—"

"Right after shooting my dad pointblank in the chest." Sasuke's eyes widened.

"According to the doctors, it happened the same around the same time I got home, but I never heard the shots, just saw their bodies lying there. But no one bought that. There was no silencer on the gun, the scientists said that my mother couldn't have shot herself…and then the lawyers found out about my…anger issues, and I got sentenced to ten years. After that, relations with Onhanishuri dissolved without my dad, and now were at war. People who 'knew what I did' blamed me for the war. They said I did it to serve the 'Fox Queen', the ruler of Onhanishuri; that the blood of all the soldiers who died is on my hands. That's how I got the name 'Blood Fox'. It started with a few people, and then when some of the other inmates heard it, they assumed I was a serial killer or something so they began to avoid me. It's not so bad though, it keeps goons like Orochimaru away from me at least. Most of the time it's like they're looking right through me, like I don't exist…"

"…"

"So...do I pass?" Naruto asked after a few solid minutes of silence. After another excruciating period of noiselessness he was thoroughly convinced that Sasuke view of him was no different than any of the other prisoners; he had just made a new enemy. "Fine, I see how it is; I'll just stay out of your way. You'll never have to deal with m-"

"Don't try to weasel out of your job Uzumaki" Sasuke reprimanded, cutting him off. Naruto was dumbstruck.

"You mean you believe me?" he squawked. It wasn't like it was the first time someone had, but his raven-haired cellmate hadn't exactly been all that understanding.

"Of course I do. For now, at least. It's not like you've given me any reason to doubt you. But like I said this is all contingent on how much off that is true, one misplaced fact, and you can forget all this." Sasuke stated flatly.

Naruto could have kissed him. Grinning from ear to ear, he could only muster two words: "Thank you"

"What for being cynical?" the other replied, in mild disbelief.

"Hey, most people don't even give me that much. A spit in the face is always better than a punch to the groin right?" the blond chirped back. Sasuke wasn't sure how to respond to that, beyond raising and eyebrow. "Besides" he continued, "I get to 'bang you' so that makes up for the rest of it."

Sasuke groaned, remembering that annoying part of the plan he was trying to forget. "Fine" he said, resigned to his humiliating fate, "Let's just get this over with."

"Wait, wha? Now?" Naruto asked, in slight shock. He had thought Sasuke might want some more time to digest what he had heard before diving back into their plan. But if it was what the kid wanted… "Alright then, come stand next to me." Sasuke did as he was told, albeit, grudgingly. But no sooner had he reached the blond, the other man shoved him, with a great deal of force, back onto the bottom bunk.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" he hissed at his fast approaching cellmate.

"Making this convincing" Naruto reminded him. "Just follow my lead"

No sooner had the words spilled from his lips, Naruto shoved Sasuke to make him lay down, before flipping him over and grabbing his hips. "Told ya this was coming bitch!" he shouted, making sure all the other prisoners within the first few rows could hear him. "_Try struggling a bit, and grab the sheets" _he added softly.

Sasuke knew that, for once, he should let Naruto lead, so he continued to follow the blond's soft instructions. He began thrashing around in the bunk yelling all manner of profanity at his acting aggressor. The one good part of all this was he was finally able to let the prison know _exactly _how he felt about them without repercussions. Finally, he wrested the thin sheet from underneath the two of them, in an attempt to try and cover himself.

"_You're doing great." _Naruto reassured him. "Yeah, don't worry Hotstuff, I'll keep you covered. No one gets to see this fine ass but me!" He taunted, slipping back into his loud persona's voice. He then threw in a stinging smack to Sasuke's bottom for good measure. The dark-haired man was about to complain again to his pretending captor, but before he could, he felt the hands that were straddling his hips pulling them close to… Sasuke didn't even want to think about it.

_"That's enough" _he hissed at the man above him. "_Get your- _UMF!" Naruto had shoved his torso back onto the bed. Sasuke was now on all fours; face down, ass in the air, with another man ready to take him from behind. He didn't know if Naruto was still acting or not, but he didn't care one bit. He resumed thrashing about on the small bed, only this time it was for real. Fear began to sink in as Naruto held him effectively in place. He couldn't even yell at the bastard as his face was buried in his pillow, to the point where he could barely breathe.

"Yeah, just take it traitor! You know you want it traitor!" Sasuke heard Naruto say. The fear was clutching his chest in an icy vice. Before he could stop himself, he was reduced to a muffled whimper. Then he felt the bed rocking back and forth. He heard the creak of the cheap wood as Naruto rocked back and forth. He realized in relief that his cellmate had stuck with the plan. Naruto was shifting his weight on his knees to shake the bed. He didn't even touch the back of his hips as he gyrated on the bunk.

After what seemed like an hour to the Uchiha, of creaking and moaning, Sasuke heard his roommate let out a guttural moan before collapsing on his back. Sasuke shoved him off with all of his frustration in tow, then turned to face his "rapist". Naruto looked at him with a lazy smile, and decided to throw out one last line to his fellow prisoners. "Don't worry, sweetness, I'm a gentleman. Here's a kiss goodnight."

To Sasuke's horror, Naruto actually did lean in for a kiss. He had told him not to do this! Sasuke was frozen in shock as his so-called partner began to lean in. Only when Naruto's face was an inch from his own did he react, sliding his hands between their faces to push him away. He heard a small sound of fear, only to curse himself when he realized it had come from him. They just lay there in silence before Naruto spoke up.

"I…I'm so sorry." He whispered softly, his voice trembling with remorse. "I just thought…I was…I'm so sorry."

"Hn. It's fine, but I don't want to do that again." Sasuke said soberly, although unable to meet Naruto eyes." They found themselves in silence again, not needing to say anything else. Until, about an hour or so later Naruto, once again, broke the silence.

"Sasuke, I need to know." Naruto pleaded, "Do you trust me?"

"I told you, I believe your story." Sasuke responded coolly. "Demon-Lover"

"So you think they're really an item, my man?" Deidara asked his partner giddily. Said partner shifted in annoyance in his bottom bunk. The noises coming from the younger prisoners' cell, combined with his insatiable cellmate were rapidly ensuring a sleepless night for the crimson-haired convict. Sasori groaned, Deidara had finally calmed down before all this too. He mentally added insomnia to his list of reasons to make Sasuke and Naruto's lives a living Hell. Finally, and although acutely aware that responding would only exacerbate his situation, Sasori decided to answer his fellow artist.

"It doesn't matter, a relationship or lack thereof, will not get in the way of our plans. If anything we should be grateful they are always in each other's company." he responded in his characteristic monotone voice. His partner said nothing; he assumed that the blond had not gotten the answer he wanted. _'That was strangely easy' _he thought, but it at least meant that he could get some rest for once. But sadly for the red-haired convict, Deidara's happy-go-lucky voice hammered at his ears yet again.

"Kill two birds with one stone huh? Heh, it's almost poetic!" the blond man mused.

"Hmph." Sasori tried to ignore his partner, but that plan fell through as Deidara leaped from his top bunk, to give his cellmate a sly smile.

"Y'know, it's been awhile, since we had a li'l fun ourselves." he purred in that sultry voice only Sasori got to hear. That certainly got Sasori's attention. The red-head's eyes shot open in disbelief, Deidara was almost never this forward in anything, let alone this. He wasn't sure how to respond at first.

"That's because," Sasori stammered before collecting himself, and continuing on in his usual gruff demeanor. "A: I have more important things to do than romp around in a tiny stone jail cell with you, and B…you take too long…You know I don't like to be kept waiting…" he finished, a rare blush adorning his face.

"Sasori…" Deidara pursued, his lips curving into a smile his partner had never seen before. It was almost a smirk, but with laughter behind it. Both alluring and repulsive at the same time, the recipient of the blond inmate's plea could not ignore if he tried. Which he did. Desperately.

"What's with the face?" Sasori finally asked, unable to stand it any longer. His partner's grin only broadened.

"C'mere Puppet-Boy. Make yer Daddy talk." Sasori nearly fell out of the bed. After donning his own unique facial expression, a grimace that could take the paint off walls, he turned his back to his cellmate. Once said cellmate recovered from rolling on the cell floor in hysterics, Sasori spoke one last time that night.

"That's it. I am never letting you watch Jeff Dunham again."

___________.__

**_There we have it, please rate and review. _**


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